After 24...

After 24...

24?...

After 24 years, I've finally met my father.A blog is a diary then I'm doing the right purpose of a blog. Why am I sharing to you this experience of mine? Being an introverted person, this is my only means for now to inspire
you or at least gave you something to read for.

My last blog post sounded like a cry for desperation. I lost my cellphone, my only means of communication with my father. Without any back-up files for my contact numbers,this gave me some regrets but I still have to do something. So I e-mailed one my uncle from Italy,send message in his friendster and facebook
accounts. Still no reply, I can't think of anything to do. Then I remembered that my uncle said he reads my blog so I made a blog post announcing that I had a new cellphone number. For a week,still no calls from my cellphone, so I go back in time when e-mails was not yet invented. I send a snail mail (not really a snail mail, expected to be sent in a day) through delivering service company.

Then here comes July 24,Saturday, and I had a class to teach, it was from 7am 'til 4pm but I only teach 'til 10am. I don't had the drive to teach during that day, I know that laziness was not a reason. But this became at least a perfect timing for me, it was as I remebered 2pm, watching TV and living the life of a
couch potato when someone called through my cellphone.

"Hello."

"Hello Michael"

"Hello 'tay" ("Hello dad")

I instantly realized it was him 'cause I'm expecting him to call for quite a long time. He said that he was in the Philippines asking me if I want to meet him on that very day.

Of course, I won't refuse. I took a bath, dressed-up and told my mother about it. I say goodbye to her, excited to see my father for the first time.

If you noticed, my mother and father had their family of their own and obviously, I lived with Mommy.

I got three step-sisters and a step-brother in my mother's side. I've loved all of them as if they're my full-blooded siblings. I'm very thankful that God gave me those angels in my life.

That day was also the day that I had received my salary as a part-time instructor in a university so, I had the money to travel. The place where we will meet is not that far away. About two hour trip, compare when I had to go in his native province which is about a twelve hours traveling time from our house.

I came to the meeting place at five in the afternoon and I had to wait 'til eight. That wait is nothing compared to 24 years. The meeting place was in a shopping  mall, my cousin texted me that they're about to come so I wait near the entrance door. I want to be ready enough, but unexpectedly someone pat me at the back.

WOW!!! It was my father and I can't believed my eyes, the scene was not so dramatic,I just got some teary eyes. I don't try to resist my emotions just because I'm in a public place. That was the reaction that came up from me, I hugged my father for the very first time(obviously) and just like me, he had a bit introverted personality. When we found a place to eat and have some father and son conversation. 24 years is quite a long time so I had so many things to ask. But, that does not happen, I can't find any words to say.

At the restaurant, I asked some classic questions like "how are you?" and can't find any more words to say. I'm just looking at him, can't believe that this day will come. I don't have any resentment at all with him, I'm just happy to see him face-to-face.

It was more than two years ago, the night before Christmas when he first called me at the phone. He said that he's sorry for what he'd done to me. One of I think my good qualities (ehem!) is I can easily forgive people no matter how much pain they've done to me. I think I'm too lazy to take a grudge with people, it's quite unfair when you've been hurt and you hurt yourself more by your anger.

Yap, I admit it is a painful experience to grew-up without the guide of a father,my case is not really unique. Two of my cousins in my father's side grew-up also without a father. This also happens to sons and daughters who had parent(s) working abroad.

Ahmm, ok back to day I first met him. With my cousin, we go to the condo unit of my uncle nearby the mall where we first met. There we got some quite times together. In a room we're left alone and I hugged him for a long time. I never hugged anyone like that in my entire life before. I almost cry during that moment.

I think the time was 2 o'clock in the morning so he have to have some good enough sleep. Then I  woke up early at 7 o'clock , my father's getting ready to go to his own condo. That was another story to tell. Then I think at nine in the morning of course, he waved goodbye, I'm now with my cousin.

We wait 'til the mall open their stores to find something to eat. Then we got a little conversation also about his experience of living a life without seeing your own father. He's 26 years old and never saw his.We played basketball, the sport that I love but unfortunately, the sports don't love me that much. I will made a shot for
every 20 tries, that's why I refuse to play in college. Anyway, we enjoy playing and getting wet with sweat(eew!). He waved goodbye to me after we had made ourselves more pleasant in looks and smell. We had to part our ways for the meantime.

"Your life can be made even better by the things that break your heart"

Just read it from a book, I love reading and that is one of my simplest pleasures in life. I just want to say that even shortcomings and adversities can be the best thing that could ever happen to you. Unless your six feet under the ground, problem will never get out of your way and their essential for our personal growth.

Being a hyper-duper timid boy, always worried what would other people think. I was always content playing video games since I was seven years old. Now, I'm more watchful when I think that I'm being compulsive again. I'm still a timid boy, still having a hard time looking at other people's eye when talking to them.But, gradually I know that I grew as a better person and will never stop on growing, does we have a choice?

As I continue, more than two weeks after that extraordinary event. Back to my work and having a break with my co-workers(friends). I got again a phone call, I know it was him not because I recognized his voice but because I now have his number.

He invited me to his house, he said his wife and my sister want to see me. I was thrilled to hear that. As far as I know, my step-mother was not happy at first when she learned about me, I can't blame her. I'm just not expecting that she will suddenly accept me. That's the reason that's why I had to meet my father in a mall and have to sleep at my uncle's condo.

I under-timed in my work and excited to see my step-mom and sister for the first time. This is a bit embarrassing, but I was lost finding the address of their home. So my father have to pick me up 'cause I'm like a stray cat finding it's owner. Finally, I saw again my father, I can't explain again how I felt during that time knowing that this time I will saw my step-mom and especially my sister. I got already three(and a brother) so I'm excited to have another one.

So when I saw my newest sister in a function hall, what you expect? I can't say a word again.Another wow experience, overwhelmed, I just shake her hands as though we were business partners. I want to hug her but I hesitated. There's a video-oke (music box), I love to sing and I think she also did. I say to myself that we must at least connect there. While eating, she ask me about where I work and some personal matters as though she's elder than me.

After that I'm thinking that I have to go home even it's a bit late at night. My father and some of my relatives insist to sleep at their house. The truth at the back of my mind, I'm also expecting that.hehe...

At his house, I get to know some of my relatives especially with my sister. I got a great bonding moments also with two of my cousins but the other one only speaks Italian so it's a big language barrier for us. Thanked God my sister speaks Filipino or else I don't know what shall I say, maybe sign language will do.

The day after we go shopping. While me and my father waiting for my step-mom and sister choose their clothes to buy, he asked me if I want to stay 'til they get back to Italy. I have to go back to work, I think at first. How selfish I am to think like that? Work will always be there but these moments with my father,my sister and my step-mom. This don't happens everyday, I have to wait again for at least 2 years.During that day, I'm really ready to go home with my mother, satisfied that at least my step-mom accepted me as part of their family and happy to saw my sister. But when my father asked me to stay, I decided to take the opportunity to savor the moment or this will be another big regret to me.

During those five days, I got some good times with my sister asking about the life I've been through. I asked her the same question and we enjoyed our talk. We got to know each other deeply. She taught me some Italian words and how to swim freestyle, I'm just half the pool and get tired. It looks easy but not to me. She also invite me ice skating, I'm already thinking to file a sick leave in my work when I heard that. But when we were at the place, we just seat beside the by-standers(they're also seating) outside the skating rink enjoying to watched the graceful skaters, whew!

We also go to some of the houses of some of our relatives. Shocks! I got a really big family in my father's side. One of the best thing that I love about is they love to eat. For five consecutive days especially when we go to my relatives', I lived like a king, I eat, eat and eat. From breakfast, lunch, merienda(snack), dinner and between. And between those betweens, there's also betweens.In short I only stop eating when I'm asleep. Good thing I haven't got a lockjaw.

Just like in dinner, they will offer every single food at the table. I never refuse unless there's no space in my plate. I was overwhelmed on the way they treat me, on the attention I got from all of them, they're all been good to me.

Those great times with my father, step-mom, sister, cousins, uncles, aunties, grandma and other new relatives had an expiration date. They had to go back to Italy, my father and step-mom had their job to do, and my sister had to pursue her studies. When time to say goodbye, I hugged my father, step-mom and sister. Although I have to wait again for their return, I knew that I do the right thing to stay with them for a longer time than what I intended. Five days without deodorant and perfume is quite a challenge. I think not just for me but also for the people around me. Yikes! LOL.

After a couple of hours, I'm the one whose supposed to go. I hugged my grandma and my cousins, thankful for giving me one of my most unforgettable week of my life.

There were many other good things happened during those times but for me I've shared enough. Anyway, until now I don't know how my father get my cellphone number.I don't know if it was from my last blog post. I don't really care. So many more important things to be thankful for.

(hingang malalim)


Some parting words, those things were really great experience but that does not happen by itself. It's not just I woke up in the morning beside with my father. It really starts when I was in college. Our field trip was in a place where my father lived, some of my friends remember that once I told them that he lives there. The only thing that I knew about him during that time was his name (it was in my birth certificate) and the province where he live, which happen to be the place where we will go. One of my classmate made a great effort to find their exact location. He knows who he is when he read this blog. Also with our tour guide, Kuya Marney, I don't know the exact things they do but I know that they're been a great blessings and God's instrument to me. God has his own way.

The unexpected is really the only thing you can expect in life.

Forgive me for being dramatic and grammatic. LOL. Sorry for some grammatical errors.I appreciate any corrections regarding with that.

Anyway, I hope you find this blog post fascinating to read. It comes form my personal experiences so no one  have this story in the whole planet except me just like everybody.